Some Interesting Facts

Please do not read further if you're not interested in animal mating. This rather interesting discussion started when we saw baboons during our safari. We saw about 60- 70 baboons going down the Tarangire River for their evening jaunt to get water:

You will notice some with red bums- these are females and you can see some with little babies on their back or under their belly. The red means they are 'in heat' and ready to make more little bundles of joy. As they moved down to the water, I had noticed one male jump a female and then fall off after 5- 10 seconds. So I asked our Guide Jacumba if it was difficult for baboons to copulate and he said 'not at all' since it takes only 5- 10 seconds to complete the deed! 

So then I got to thinking about the time it takes animals to, you know, 'do it'. If anyone knew the answers, it had to be Jacumba. So with all the fearless inquisitiveness I could muster, I asked the questions I kind of wanted to know but thought it crazy to ask. Here goes...

If you thought baboons were quick to get off, giraffes are even faster to reach nirvana. Visualize two 15 feet tall animals trying to connect. With their long necks, the male is looking about 10 feet away from a rather concealed area and without hands, this takes a number of tries to dock, so to speak. But once entering, it's immediate Hallelujah and nothing more to do.

  

Now elephants are considerably longer in time and takes about 10- 12 minutes to do the deed. The female has some say here and has to agree with the advances because they won't put up with 6 tons on their back just because any guy wants to do it.

Hippos take even longer- about 20 minutes to copulate and they do it in water. They weigh 3 tons and it seems to me that elephants could learn something here about weight and water.  

And then there are rhinos- definitely the longest at 35- 40 minutes. Rhino males that complete the mating are the strongest of most other males as it takes so long to reach that happy time. Many a male rhinos try to do it but can't finish because they're not strong enough to stay mounted for that amount of time. 

Then, sadly, we talked about the crazy poachers here in Africa that kill rhinos for their tusks. There is a big market for ground-up tusks in Arab countries and Japan for male arousal and enhanced stamina. Jucumba and I made the decision that to kill a beautiful animal just for this is unbelievably cruel and ridiculous. We decided to create a new species and we're calling these guys a bunch of dicks!